Another half-pound. I guess it's still a loss and a victory but at this rate I'll still be over 200 lbs come Christmas. Something has GOT to give. I mean ... I'm doing and posting daily activity but maybe all these trips to the dog park aren't actually as active as they feel. I like to run around, literally RUN around, in the grass with Vladdy because he likes to chase me and he gets all excited when I turn fast and make him turn with me. But I can't sustain that kind of activity for more than just a few minutes at a time before I am gasping for air so maybe I think I'm being just as active by running around in short spurts as I would be if I were walking for long distances but maybe that's not true. Maybe light, extended workouts were better for burn. *sigh*
I want to be happy about a loss this morning, I really do, but I am so tired of these little teeny tiny, piddly ante losses! And I can tell that you are all getting sick of them too because thread comments have dropped to almost nothing in the last few weeks and page hits are down dramatically as well which means I'm not as interesting as I used to be. That's no surprise; it's far less motivating to watch a fat chick whittle off a half-pound per week and you're all thinking the same thing I'm thinking ... the inch worm on my weight loss counter is starting to look really appropriate. I'm getting sick of this. I felt better, slept better, and had higher excitement and motivation levels when I was losing 2-3 lbs per week, not to mention less stress, and I just need to get off my bulbous ass and do it.
Somewhere something broke and I went back to my old mentality of thinking "oh I can skip exercise tonight, it's not that big of a deal" but yes, it is that big of a deal and I just need to break out of this funk. I keep telling myself that but when push comes to shove and I'm sitting on a recliner thinking about going for a walk I somehow almost always end up making the wrong decision. It's tough love time guys. You've been supportive, you've been encouraging, you've been sympathetic but I started this blog because I needed to be accountable to someone other than myself because I knew that, eventually, I would let myself off easy. Don't hold back people, this is when I need you the most.
Give it to me straight. Boo, throw popcorn and rotten tomatoes, tell me how disappointed you are in me ... something, anything. I need someone to challenge me and challenge me big time because it is when someone tells me "you can't do it" that my stubborn attitude kicks in and I do whatever it takes to prove them wrong. I perform best under pressure and lately there just hasn't been any pressure to succeed, especially not from myself. This is not ok! It is not ok that I'm stalling out and crawling along. I am FAR FROM THERE and it is not ok that I am subconsciously accepting an accumulative 50 lb loss as success when I still have 99 lbs to go. I can't allow myself to be happy with "close enough" ... I'm nowhere near close enough. Now I need to hear that from you!
7 glasses of water
1 cup of coffee w/creamer
1 cup of Kona Coffee (not sure what's in it but it was tasty)
1/2 serving sunflower seeds
1 serving taco pie (lunch)
1 chicken fajita pita
Daily Caloric Intake: 984
5 flights of stairs
Walking: Walked the dogs to the dog park from softball (about 1/2 a mile)
Sprinting: Sprinted with Vladdy again tonight at the park but this time I didn't settle for sprinting until I just ran out of breath. I really got into it. At one point Vladdy took off with the ball in his mouth and I chased him full speed around the tables full of people, through the gazebo and around the watering station before finally cornering him behind a poop-station where we went side-to-side a few times until I finally outsmarted him and got the ball away. I also sprinted around in the grass with him four or five times with three or four laps each time, doing fast stops and turns to keep him from running in front of me (almost slid and fell on my ass once and he bit me on the ass once which was an interesting experience) and then finally stopped when he got tired and laid down. Of course I didn't tire him out single handedly, I had help from a Weimaraner, a boxer, and a German Shepard in between sprints while I caught my breath. I truly, deep down, actually feel good about the level of exercise I got tonight even if I can't count the sprinting in my 15 mile goal for the week.